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Grief Resources

Facing up to  grief

  There comes a time in our lives when the loss of someone close makes us helpless. The overwhelming emotions experienced at this moment have only one label - grief.

  This page contains some information we trust will be of help to anyone who is currently experiencing the loss of a loved one who has died. In time we will expand this information.

When you experience grief it is normal to feel:
  like you are "going crazy"
  unable to focus or concentrate
  irritable or angry (at the deceased, oneself,
    others, higher powers)
  frustrated or misunderstood
  anxious, nervous, or fearful
  like you want to "escape"
  guilt or remorse

Healing your grief
Several authors have described typical stages or needs that the grieving person experiences. For example, Elisabeth Kubler-Ross suggested that grief is characterized by the stages of denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. Alan Wolfelt described "mourning needs," which include acknowledging the reality of the death, embracing the pain of the loss, remembering the person who died, developing a new self-identity, searching for meaning, and receiving ongoing support from others.

It is important to note that the grief process is often experienced in cycles. Grief is sometimes compared to climbing a spiral staircase where things can look and feel like you are just going in circles, yet you are actually making progress. Patience with the process and allowing feelings to come without judgment can help. If you feel stuck in your grief, talking to a counsellor or a supportive person may help you move forward in the healing process.

Useful Links
  A New Zealand group dealing in support after

  Helping children to cope with grief

  24 hr help for anyone experiencing trauma

  Support for children, young people and their
  families through tough times of change, loss and

   New Zealand National Association for Loss and
   Grief. A voluntary, non-profit organisation which
   focuses on issues related to loss and grief.


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